WOULD YOU STEP INTO THE BREAST....I MEAN THE BREACH?

2/04/12

OK, forgive the title.  But I know you have been following the whole Susan G. Komen/Planned Parenthood controversy.  So tell me, would you forgive them?  Would you pretend it never happened?

Well, no matter your answer, let’s think about all of this for a minute.  There are many who have said that “charity” or “medical care” should not be political.  Come on.  Really?  It is often political.  In the US, public health care is a political football.  And indeed, many charities are not secular in nature.  Let’s face it, there are catholic charities, jewish charities, African American, Hispanic, all sorts of charities that are belief driven (not to be confused with mission driven).  So, up to this point in time, SGK has been very explicit about their mission (basically to eradicate breast cancer), but has not been so explicit about their beliefs.  That is, until a couple of days ago.  They, defacto, declared their belief to be Pro-Life.  Now, I saw the founder of SGK, Nancy Brinker, on television the day before the “switchback”, and let me tell you, the level of rationalization and soft-speak rivaled the slickest most unprincipled politico.  Even after a defacto declaration, she was unwilling to own it.

I am not going to weigh in on the issue of Pro-Life/Pro-Choice, because that isn’t the point here.  What I see here is the leadership of a very substantial charity with a very laudable mission who lack principle.  Had they come out and said, as a Board, we do not support abortion and therefore cannot support Planned Parenthood, I may or may not be aligned with them, but I would have respected their principles.  But what did they do?  They double-spoke, and ultimately caved, not because of a change of belief, but because of money.  They were losing support (and therefore money) at an alarming rate, and they lacked the principle to stand up for their values, and lacked the principle to accept the consequences.

And therefore, no matter your view; whether you agree or disagree with their beliefs, this is not an organization worth supporting.  And I’m not saying that we shouldn’t support the cause.  We should just make sure that we support the cause through other charitable organizations.

And remember, there is a lesson here for all of us as individuals:  Wear your beliefs on your sleeve.  Celebrate them.  Accept the consequences of those beliefs and earn the respect of everyone.

 (see “A Million and One Ways to be One-in-a-Million”; Chapter 2 – The Gift,  Chapter 3 – Luke….Use the Force; Chapter 8 – You Always Have Choices)

CLOSE ENCOUNTERS OF THE CHRISTMAS TIME....

1/06/12

Happy New Year!  Don’t you find, sometimes, that holidays are a time for strange encounters?  Sometimes good, sometimes bad, but most times eye-opening.  I remember writing about one last year that embodied the holiday spirit (see “Lots of Heart” at www.be1inamillion.blogspot.com).  This year, well, not so much.  In fact, I had two somewhat similar experiences.  Each experience was in the midst of the holiday season and each of them was disconcerting in and of itself.  But it was my reaction to each that I want to talk to you about.  So let me tell you about them:

For the first encounter, I was at Lavo, a Restaurant/Bar on 58^th between Park and Madison, having holiday drinks with a friend of mine.  I had to visit the men’s room and as I entered, two men preceded me.  Now the men’s room was not large.  Two “stand-up” stations and one “sit-down”.  The guys who got there before me went to the stand up spots, which left me with the sit-down station (even though I only needed to stand-up).  One guy says to the other guy; “I took my staff out to lunch today, and it cost me 500 bucks.  500 bucks of my own money for lunch for a bunch of retards”.  “How much does 500 retard dollars buy?” the other guys says.  And they proceed to talk back and forth like this until I step out of the stall.

For the second encounter, I was at 60^th and Amsterdam, walking back to my apartment.  There was a couple slightly ahead of me.  A well dressed distinguished looking man in his 60’s, and a well dressed, slightly younger woman beside him.  He was on his cell phone and as I walked past them (I was walking faster), I heard him say “I’m standing beside a f*#king moron, and you know who that is, who has no clue where she is going.”  After he gets off the phone, he continued to verbally abuse her.  She said very softly “you need help” to which he replied “I need help?  I’m the most self-sufficient guy there is.  I don’t need help with anything.”

So how do you think I reacted?  And how would you react?  Honestly – what do you think you would do? 

Well, in the men’s room, as I went to the sink to wash my hands, I kinda pushed one of the guys out of the way.  He said “Hey! What are you doing?  I’m using the sink?”  Well, now that WE were engaged in a conversation, I let him know what I heard and what I thought.  Very expressively by the way (my first job out of university was in a factory, so I know how to cuss someone out rather forcefully).  They actually both apologized, and I stepped out of the men’s room leaving them there to wonder what the hell had happened, and feeling pretty good about myself.

And on the street?  Well, I did nothing.  That’s right.  Nothing.  And I still feel terribly about that.

You see, we can tell ourselves that some things are none of our business.  And to be sure, some things are.  But when people are being abused or denigrated, or otherwise harmed in some way, we should make it our business.  You can pick the arena: business, politics, religion, sports, entertainment, education, everywhere.  There are stark examples of bad things being done to people that no one confronts.  And whether it’s the “it’s none of my business excuse” or any other excuse, THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR INACTION.  And I can tell you, what happened on 60^th street that day between Christmas and New Year’s will not happen to me again.  I will intervene every time from now on.

(see “A Million and One Ways to be One-in-a-Million”; Chapter 2 – The Gift,  Chapter 3 – Luke….Use the Force)